Tag Archives: thoughts

Indecisiveness

Sometimes, a blank page is all you see. You hold a pen in your hand, thinking about things to say, things to write, things to do; but nothing clicks. Or maybe it does click at times, but your hand doesn’t consider it worthy enough to let the thought flow in the form of ink through your pen.

You have in your hand scores of pressing issues to be solved as soon as possible, personal issues, issues requiring only your personal opinion. Yet, you somehow manage to find silly excuses to postpone it, you rely on other so-called important tasks at hand, to ignore the really important issues.

But procrastination isn’t the solution. Sooner or later, we have to face it, we need to face it, before it’s too late to act upon. But when? But how?

– Suri

Stories

We all have different stories. No two people living on this planet can have the exact same story. Each one of us has a different set of the past, the present and the future. We can have similar stories, and sometimes that’s how people connect. But at other times we have our stories so entirely different than those around us that we may find it very difficult to connect. There are no connecting dots or no parallel lines or – if geometry interests you that much then, I’d say – no concentric circles!
Yet, we – as social beings – have to find ways to connect through those differences.

Every day is a new day. Each day brings us new hope, new opportunities, new experiences. Some days are good, while some are not as good. But they are part of our story, aren’t they? The good days, the bad ones, the ones where we cried for a small bar of chocolate and also the ones where we cried out of joy at the birth of our child. They all help in creating an outline of our story – the particularly major ones.

I believe that our stories create us as an individual, as a human. Yes, our decisions mould us into an individual. But what are those decisions based upon? – our experiences! And what are those experiences? – our stories!! So take wise decisions and make your story the best one of all, let it reverberate throughout the histories of the future.

Good luck. Have a nice day!

– Suri

Thunderstorms

Monsoon is Coming.. (now read it again the same way Jon Snow would say, ‘Winter is Coming‘.) *

Scary, eh?

The arrival and departure of monsoon are the two times of the year that I find the scariest. The rains comes and goes all with it’s musical thunder and the eerie lightning.

To tell you the truth, it’s not the lightning that bothers me. It’s the seconds after the lightning… the long seconds of anticipation and dread of how loud or how long the thunder would last. Sometimes the thunder would even act as a timid friend, staring sheepishly from behind it’s curtains of clouds but making as little gurgling (yes, ew!) noise as possible. And at other times – when we least expect it – it will come out as a sly and cunning enemy and roar as high as it could.

Ah, how I hate the thunder! The enmity goes back a long way down the memory lane. Maybe someday I would talk about it. But not today. Today I want to face it. It’s thundering even now, even as I write this blog post. It’s just a shy, gurgling though, but I’m sure the volume will increase. Monsoons are arriving here in Mumbai (India) and scaring me as always, each year, on it’s onset and while it leaves.

To make myself feel better in such a situation, I try to make up funny stories. I imagine the Gods up there fighting over petty issues like, ‘WHO ATE MY CANDY??!!’, and then getting pissed out about it so just shoving or bumping things here and there, like sometimes when we’re angry we slam the door too loudly or push the chair or table harshly around, the same way. I try to imagine that it’s nothing more than that. Just the shoving of some chairs, no big deal.

But this is so ridiculous and it sounds so funny, even in my head. I know even a third grader won’t be assured by this story.

It’s 3:00 a.m. and I know that I must sleep, but I can’t. I’m thinking about the thunder, the lightning and the monsoons. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate them all. I love monsoon when it’s quiet, when it’s quietly raining. It’s a very lovely, romantic season. I kind of like the lightning too. But speaking of thunder, I only have a hate – hate relationship with it.

Well, I’ll try to sleep now, before the thundering gets any worse. Off I go…

Good night! 😀

Do you guys have similar fears about thunder? If yes, how do you face them? Let me know. 🙂

– Suri

* a Game Of Thrones reference

Adulting

When I was younger, I always wanted to grow up. To grow up so I could be in charge, so I could make my own decisions. I had no say in any of the major decisions that my family took, because I was a child. I hated it.

Now that I’m elder though, I realize how hard it is, to be in charge. I get a say in those decisions, but I never say the say. I mean, today, when I get the chance to speak up, I don’t. I worry instead. I start thinking. I start thinking about the pros and cons. I start thinking about my past mistakes. I start worrying about the future.

As a child, when I looked at any adult I envied them for their independence, their freedom. Now as an adult in my early 20s when I get the same freedom and voice which I so long desired for, I do absolutely nothing about it. It’s only lying rotting day by day in some unseen, dark and damp corner of a long forgotten room.

– Suri

Why Do I Care?

I sometimes wonder why do I care so much. There are people who absolutely give no shit about others and yet they are doing all fine. Of course they do. The life of an individual doesn’t depend on another. Everyone makes their own destiny. Humans create their path to success alone. Yet they are social animals. They can’t be completely alone. They need to have friends, family, someone to love, someone to trust. Also it’s a very risky job to trust someone in today’s world. There are just too many complications involved. You can never tell the true intentions of a fellow human. Trusting animals is way better.

— Suri

thinking

Thinking.

Still thinking..

Always thinking…

Do you ever feel like you’re thinking just too much and want to stop thinking? Like completely want to stop thinking? No thoughts at all? I don’t know about you, but I’m surely in one of those phases where I want to stop thinking. I would be happy even if I’m granted this wish for an hour. The cluttering of hundreds and thousands of thoughts and feelings inside me sometimes feels like a burden. A huge burden that weighs me down. And as I age more and more each year, I can feel my burden weighing more and more. I wonder when it’ll become so heavy that I’ll tumble and fall down with it. I hope it doesn’t end that way.

I’m searching for a way to control these thoughts. Meditation is the usual suggestion but I’m not really sure that I can be that patient to try it. Some suggest that instead of wanting to stop the thoughts, why not give it a proper outlet? By speaking it out or by writing it down, you’ll feel better. Well, I don’t know.. Let’s see. 
What do you bloggers suggest? 😀
– Suri 

Turbulence

It’s times like these when she wished she had a brother, an elder brother. A brother with whom she could share anything and everything, without the fear of being judged, accused, abandoned or ashamed. A brother who she could call up at any hour of the day, to cry about her heartbreaks, her sorrows, her downfalls. A brother upon whom she could trust completely. A brother to share her joys with, to celebrate with the one who cares!

A brother to take her to places where she wouldn’t have gone without an escort. She would have opened up to him entirely, leaving not a single bit behind. He would know that his sister was an adorable little psycho and he would be fine with it. Because he would understand. He would have experienced the same kind of things that she had experienced at some point in his life. It would feel good for him as well, to have someone to share his knowledge of life with, the way he learnt it. He would try and correct his little sister whenever he felt like she’s taking a wrong decision, the wrong path. And she would always listen to him, no matter what, because he would be the only one who completely understands her!

Sometimes at night when she’s alone, she cries aloud, “Oh brother, why do I always cry for you even when I know you don’t exist?” How is it possible for someone to cry over something which never existed in the first place?

– Suri

Roses

Yes, the flower is a bit dried up. The petals are now starting to curl. It’s getting darker around the edges.

Only a day prior, the rose was so fresh and so full of life, without any mark. Today, it still is full of life but with some bruises.

Isn’t life the same? We all are naive and innocent initially. But as the days pass by, we learn new things, we acquire new bruises, we grow up.

We’ll start shedding our petals once we start getting older but till then we have the chance to bring happiness to someone, to someone in need, to someone with bruises. 🙂

— Suri

Declutter.

Mind-3

Everyone expects you to focus;

nobody tells you how to declutter.

People give you tips on how to learn new things with zeal and enthusiasm

but what about the pre-existing things on my mind? How am I to declutter those?

I sure can’t just put a needle through my mind and make it burst like a big, fat balloon.

(I wish I could… )

 

– Suri