Tag Archives: thinking

Adulting

When I was younger, I always wanted to grow up. To grow up so I could be in charge, so I could make my own decisions. I had no say in any of the major decisions that my family took, because I was a child. I hated it.

Now that I’m elder though, I realize how hard it is, to be in charge. I get a say in those decisions, but I never say the say. I mean, today, when I get the chance to speak up, I don’t. I worry instead. I start thinking. I start thinking about the pros and cons. I start thinking about my past mistakes. I start worrying about the future.

As a child, when I looked at any adult I envied them for their independence, their freedom. Now as an adult in my early 20s when I get the same freedom and voice which I so long desired for, I do absolutely nothing about it. It’s only lying rotting day by day in some unseen, dark and damp corner of a long forgotten room.

– Suri

thinking

Thinking.

Still thinking..

Always thinking…

Do you ever feel like you’re thinking just too much and want to stop thinking? Like completely want to stop thinking? No thoughts at all? I don’t know about you, but I’m surely in one of those phases where I want to stop thinking. I would be happy even if I’m granted this wish for an hour. The cluttering of hundreds and thousands of thoughts and feelings inside me sometimes feels like a burden. A huge burden that weighs me down. And as I age more and more each year, I can feel my burden weighing more and more. I wonder when it’ll become so heavy that I’ll tumble and fall down with it. I hope it doesn’t end that way.

I’m searching for a way to control these thoughts. Meditation is the usual suggestion but I’m not really sure that I can be that patient to try it. Some suggest that instead of wanting to stop the thoughts, why not give it a proper outlet? By speaking it out or by writing it down, you’ll feel better. Well, I don’t know.. Let’s see. 
What do you bloggers suggest? 😀
– Suri